The connection between a cardinal fire Aries man and a mutable earth Virgo woman can strike a lot of chords, most of them discordant. This is a challenging combination, and unless the two have some connectedness and harmony in their chart synastry and a strong composite, a love relationship between them is likely to provide more stress than pleasure.
Aries Man Needs a Challenge
The Aries man means well, but he lacks sensitivity, being focused on action above all. Cardinal fire is sustained by rocket fuel. What Aries wants Aries gets, and once he has what he wants he seeks something new. This sign is not big on sustainability. He burns hot and fast! No one flirts and pursues love like an Aries man, but once the relationship is established, he tends to take it for granted. It's not that he will be unfaithful, but he moves his energy into other areas quickly. That first hot, sweet courtship is not likely to last.
Aries is wired for desire. He can never be satisfied with what he has; he grows bored with the status quo. Goals turn him on! Once he has a mate, he will direct his energies toward something fresh and new, a project or adventure that stimulates him. He does best with a partner who is energetic and open to adventure, who can join him and be inspired by his enthusiasm. Depending on where his Moon, Ascendant and other planets are, this can vary. Every Aries has a Libra Earth, so he has the potential to become sensitive. In fact, if he is to grow as a person he needs to develop that capacity. Life will hand him plenty of challenges and hard knocks to teach him sensitivity, but that typically takes time, and stubborn, self-willed Aries is not eager to learn.
Virgo Craves Routine
A Virgo woman is highly sensitised. Her physical and nervous senses are wired to 'extreme.' Loud noises distress her; she dislikes chaos, and she values order. She works hard to create an orderly life for herself and she takes her responsibilities seriously. If she has a fire sign Moon or Ascendant, well placed fiery planets or other fiery indicators in her chart, she may be primed for adventure, but the typical Virgo's idea of a good time involves staying home within her comfort zone, either alone or with someone who knows better than to rock her boat. She does not enjoy being swept off her feet; she would rather take time to get to know someone, and she is particular about how she is approached.
As the mutable earth sign Virgo can adapt but she adapts in her own way, and only one way will work for her in any situation. This is why she seems like such a perfectionist. Her comfort zone is narrow, and she easily becomes rattled and disoriented. Her Pisces Earth gives her the ability to navigate confusion and strangeness, but it is a big challenge!
Virgo and Aries Together
Unless a Virgo woman has a strong component of fire or a cardinal sign in her makeup, an Aries man is not likely to be attractive to her. She may find him admirable and even compelling from a distance, but up close in person, his energy and dynamism will fray her nerves. She craves peace and order while he brings turbulence in his wake.
Aries is ruled by Mars, the God of War, and to Aries a good fight is foreplay. Aries loves to jab, challenge and tease, and Virgo can't make head nor tail of his signals. Does he like her? Does he not? She requires clarity and sensitivity.
These two might do better as friends, but even then they need a lot of space from one another. An Aries man may find a Virgo woman attractive, but her sensitivity strikes him as persnickety and he has no patience for subtlety or discernment. This combination is fodder for many romance novels in which a strong, passionate, demanding man overwhelms a sensitive woman who at first hates him, then falls mysteriously under his spell and into love. In the real world, this scenario is unlikely at best, and at worst, can lead to an unbalanced or even abusive relationship in which her needs are ignored in favour of his dominating insistence on having his way.
A Relationship of Equals
Virgo's path is one of service. A Virgo woman might choose to serve her man in the name of love, but this cannot last, and is not healthy for her soul. A Virgo woman is independent in her core, and she must be careful what and whom she serves. She cannot be a slave to a relationship, for above all, she needs to respect herself. An Aries man craves a strong mate who can match his power and hold her own in a fight.
In order for this relationship to work, each partner should be allowed the space to be themselves in a way that does not intrude upon or violate the other's needs. With Virgo and Aries this is not easy, but it is possible. The Virgo woman needs a space of her own where she can maintain order and retreat to when she needs to recharge her batteries. The Aries man must allow her this space and not question her right to it while taking responsibility for his freedom within the boundaries they agree on.
Sexy Times Are Possible but Not Guaranteed
If these two commit to a relationship, they can share a passionate and tender love life. All earth element signs are sensuous in bed, and the fire element is hotly sexual, though Aries is not known for his subtlety or technique. If he is willing to be taught, he and his Virgo woman can experience ever deepening pleasure in intimacy together. However, he must develop his Libra Earth powers of sensitivity and balance, while the Virgo woman must learn to let go of micro-managing her experience and surrender to the infinite unknown signified by her Pisces Earth.
A relationship between an Aries man and a Virgo woman can be wonderful, but only if each is willing and able to expand and grow beyond previous limits. If they do not, this relationship could descend into martyrdom and abuse. Virgo's urge to help and serve can become beaten-down subservience, while Aries' exuberant forward drive can easily turn into dominance and abuse. This sign combination is fraught with the potential for inequality and the suffering it brings.
A Vehicle for Growth
With enough commitment, love and mutual willingness to grow, it is possible for an Aries man and a Virgo woman to have a rewarding relationship that serves as an evolutionary vehicle, but the challenges are great. Their conflicting needs and styles can cause friction between them, but if they allow each other the space to be their true selves, they can make a go of it.
