Nothing takes your breath away faster than finding out someone you love is seriously ill. You’re not alone in feeling at a loss for what to say. And when the time comes for you to reach out, don’t panic. We’ve got everything you need to know what to say when someone is sick (including all the things not to say).
What to Say to Someone Who Is Sick
One of the many symptoms major illnesses can cause is making everyone unsure of what to say to each other. From offering your help to sending someone morbidly funny texts, we’re here to help you know exactly what to say when someone you love is sick.
Supportive Things to Say to Someone Who’s Sick
Being sick can be so isolating. Help encourage and commiserate with your loved ones through these supportive sayings.
- Being stuck in a hospital is horrible, but at least you have someone to wait on you hand and foot.
- We’re going to get through this, together.
- I don’t know anyone stronger than you, and you’re going to give this [illness] a run for its money.
- I don’t want to push myself on you, but the moment you want me around, I’m there. Okay?
- We’re two peas in a pod, and we’re going to get through this together.
- I just heard the news, and I know this must be incomprehensible. I’m sending you all my love and support.
- You’ve probably heard it a thousand times already, but I love you so much and have all the confidence that you’re going to beat this.
- Things are really tough right now, but I can’t wait to take you for drinks when you’re on the other side.
- Sending you love and light.
- I’m thinking about you and sending you positive thoughts every day.
- You’ve conquered so many difficult things and beating this [illness] will be a walk in the park in comparison.
- Listen, you’ll be feeling like yourself in no time!
- We’re all wishing you a speedy recovery over here.
- I’m not sure what's the right thing to say in a situation like this, but I want you to know how much we love and support you.
- Just wanted to pop in and tell you I love you!
Related: 100 Inspirational 'Get Well Soon' Quotes to Uplift Your Loved One
Funny Things to Text Someone Who’s Sick
Sometimes the best way you can help someone who’s seriously ill is to take their mind off of their situation. Enjoy being the court jester for a little while with these texts that you can send someone who’s sick.
- So you're telling me it's NOT something a Band-Aid can fix?
- Did you feel that? It was me giving you a telepathic bear hug.
- Being sick sucks, right? Please tell me I can be a distraction.
- If you ever need someone to chat with, I’m there. Of course, unless I'm not.
- Hey, want to listen to my work drama? Give you a taste of what you’re missing.
- I had the wildest dream about us last night. Get ready to read all about it.
- You know I hate texting, but I’ll make an exception just this once.
- I think we should start a texting streak. Once a day, every day. You game?
- How high is your hospital room? I think watching me try to climb up might be just what the doctor ordered.
- Please tell me you’ve seen some ghostly activity while you’ve been at the hospital. You know there’s got to be some kind of spirit there!
- What are your thoughts on mariachi bands? Why? No reason of course. But do you think there’s a hospital policy on mariachi bands?
- I’ve got an obnoxious get-well card with your name on it, so get ready.
- I know having surgery absolutely blows, but think about the wicked scar you might get out of it!
- This week has been unreasonably boring. Please tell me you have hospital floor/staff drama to spill.
Ways to Offer Your Help to Someone Who's Ill
Words can feel incredibly hollow when someone’s dealing with a serious illness. Galvanize that need to help with these polite ways to offer your services.
- If you need anything at all, just give me a call.
- You know I’m a night owl so if you ever need someone to help you out after hours, just let me know.
- Got a hankering for anything right now? I could grab some takeout and swing by.
- Any housework that needs to be done? I’ve got a few empty hours on my hands.
- I was just going to run to the grocery store. Want anything?
- It’s an errand-running day for me, so is there anything I can do for you while I’m out?
- I was thinking about stopping by and helping you tidy up if you want.
- How are the kiddos? I was thinking I could take them off your hands for the afternoon if you want.
- I’m sure you’re tired of hospital gowns by now. What clothes can I bring by?
- There’s a bookstore on my way home from work I planned on swinging by. Any requests?
- Make some space on your side table because I’m bringing some flowers over, no ifs ands, or buts.
- When was the last time you got your nails done? I’d love to come by and pamper you for a few hours.
- How are you liking your room? Is there anything I can bring you to make it feel more homey?
Related: What to Say to Someone Going Into Surgery: 20 Messages of Support
Sensitive Ways to Check on Someone Who’s Sick
When someone's dealing with a chronic or prolonged illness, staying in the loop can be difficult. Show your support and get an idea of how your loved ones are faring with these sensitive ways to check in on someone who’s sick.
- How are you feeling today?
- What’s your blood pressure been lately?
- Have there been any new developments in your treatment plan?
- Have you vomited since the last time?
- I’m just popping in to ask if you’ve been taking your medicine on time.
- How many days of [treatment] do you have left?
- I’m counting down the days ‘til you’re out of the hospital! Any news on when that’s going to be?
- Have you been able to get up and moving today?
- How have been feeling? I mean how have you really been feeling?
- How’s your mood been throughout all of this?
- Did they finally take the catheter out? I know you were really hoping they’d be able to today.
- Have they let you get any fresh air today? I want to make sure you’re not staying cooped up in there for too long.
- Have you had a temperature lately?
- Been able to keep any solids down since the last time we talked?
Tips for What Not to Say to Someone Who’s Ill
Many people feel like the cat’s got their tongue when they find out someone they love is sick. No matter how aimless you feel about what to say, make sure you keep your messages far away from these problematic ones.
Don’t Tell Them You’re Jealous of Their Situation
Being sick is extremely difficult, and the last thing you should do is tell someone you’re jealous of the time they get off work, the attention they’re getting, or the love and support they’re being showered with. Those are the feelings you acknowledge and discuss in a professional setting, not with someone fighting a serious illness.
Don’t Make Them Feel Guilty for Being Sick
Constantly bringing up how hard or difficult someone’s illness is for you is totally inappropriate. Sure, sickness doesn’t only affect the afflicted person. But now isn’t the time to make a person already dealing with a heavy physical and mental load bear the weight of your emotions as well.
Don’t Make It All About You
If you've dealt with a similar situation in the past, you may feel compelled to talk about it with the person who’s sick. While relating to each other can really help with illness-induced isolation, be careful about crossing the line into making their illness all about you.
If someone's sick with cancer, it’s not the time to one-up their situation. For example, you shouldn't say something like, “Well, I know yours is stage 2 but mine was stage 4.”
Don’t Overstay Your Welcome
While it’s hard to physically overstay your welcome in some environments (hospital visiting hours, for example), you can certainly overstay your conversational welcome. There are moments to be a chatterbox and moments when you need to throw away the lock and key. Pay attention to the person you’re visiting and ensure they’re up for it.
Don’t Talk About Death (Unless They Give You Permission)
Some people are extremely logical and discussing the real possibility of their prognosis doesn’t bother them. Most people, on the other hand, don’t want to talk about death when facing a serious illness. Avoid morbid jokes, funeral wishes, etc. unless they broach the topic first or give you permission to do so.
Say What Feels Right
Ultimately, you know the person who’s sick far better than any of us. So, trust your gut when figuring out what to say to someone who’s ill. You’ll know what feels right and what feels wrong, and when if you don't — these messages have got you covered.
